Belligerent blues
bury friends
bury family

I haven’t always been a man
that I could be proud of.

I don’t think I had the capacity
to love anything 
but the air I could breathe.

A man of
many delusions.
Forsaken all
who have shown me humanity
as I bury friends
bury family. 

Awaken to a life
spent wallowing in hatred
I’ve never recognized myself
this ugly.

Poisoned prejudice
crawled under my skin
itching
until I bled.

Awaken to a life
you never wanted

Am I willing to change?